Saturday, March 18, 2006

What did you lose?

Its like sometimes when you can't sit down in a place,
You walk around; Fidgeting fingers; Lines on your face -
- Telling a story that you don't want to hear; You want quiet -
- Moments to wrap you in sleep; Bring peace to your eyes.
They have been flowing on with thoughts; Emotions; Cravings,
Dried pools that once used to be a sea; Like spent up savings -
- There is no more that you can give; No more you can take.
The sweat on your hands questions you; You say "I forsake"...
You want magic? Miracles? "No, I just want my sleep".
Questions; Questions; Answers; Silence is what you keep -
- Close to your heart; Closer to your thoughts; Distant from you.
You find a lie in every retreat; A lie; Its false; Is that true?
Corners in your head, with little groups of thoughts emerge -
- Murmuring sounds of disapproval; Silent when you get close.
Words gather up in scattered forms; A poetry? A prose?
You move your feet in random ways, staring at the wall,
Waiting for moments to collate into something beautiful.
It does not happen; Has it happened yet? Till now?
There is no form that they seem to take; Except shadows -
- Little; Big; small; Huge; Darkness is what darkness shows.
You the turn the chair, trying to face another wall,
As if that would have answers; You take a stroll...
Walk a few feet; Turn around; Walk; Turn; Stop; Sit.
You found peace? Something? A little bit?
None? Is there something lost that you want to find?
A memorandum of happiness? Stamped and signed?
Blank eyes look back at you from behind the cold air -
- That you breath in and out; Seconds; Minutes; Hours.
Passing by like a street side shop from within a car...
Is it getting close? Close enough? Is it so far?
What did you lose really? Just sleep or something more...

- Anubhav

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